


Escape from the Green (Back to the Green)

by kaijulvl5



Series: Escape from the Green [3]
Category: Prospect (2018)
Genre: Boundaries, Dancing, Eating, Enemies to Friends, Ezra can dance, Ezra is charming, Ezra is patient, Ezra talks a lot, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Male Masturbation, Male Solo, Masturbation, Music, Mutual Pining, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Denial, Slow Dancing, Space Elevator, Teaching piloting, Throwers, Unresolved, Unresolved Sexual Tension, pistol - Freeform, sleeping, space travel, spank bank
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:47:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28374144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaijulvl5/pseuds/kaijulvl5
Summary: The arrangement has changed, but Farra and Ezra are headed back to the Green Moon. With a long trip ahead of them, they must figure out how to coexist, cooperate and entertain themselves. Fluff with angst and a little self-satisfaction on the part of Ezra, who still, as always, can't shut up.
Relationships: Ezra (Prospect 2018) & Original Female Character(s), Ezra (Prospect 2018)/OFC, Ezra (Prospect 2018)/Original Female Character
Series: Escape from the Green [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2014753
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	Escape from the Green (Back to the Green)

Ezra was true to his word and kept to himself that night. It was the first time they had only slept together and nothing else. Farra had become so used to his attention and their closeness that she almost missed it. Almost. Even though she felt the pull of their former agreement and craved what she had given up, she refused to give in. No matter what, she was going to make him understand that this was a business deal without a physical aspect, and she was not weak-willed.

The next morning passed in uncomfortable silence. Ezra’s normally talkative nature was constrained, but sulking did not suit him and he soon settled into an easy, relaxed demeanor. Farra doubted he was being genuine. There was no way that he could relinquish that amount of authority and be as calm as he appeared. As for her, she was a mixed up ball of emotions. Joy that she had some ability to direct her own life again, sadness about what she gave up, fear for the adventure ahead and not a small amount of anger at Ezra himself. But she put on a brave face and began packing her bag. 

She mentally went over the plans she had laid. One more mistake from him, any attempts to reign over or use her, or any sign of violence toward her and she promised herself she would cut the cord. It would be hard to do with the travel and harvesting ahead. Placing herself back in a one on one situation with him wasn’t ideal, but she couldn’t afford to pass up this once in a lifetime opportunity to be financially sound. Even if it meant that she ended up in the same position as where they started. That was her worst case scenario, short of dying on the Green Moon. 

The pros and cons ran through her mind over and over again. If she could come out of this alive and rolling in aurelac, the possibilities were endless. And if she determined that Ezra was someone deserving of her further attention, well, that wouldn’t be too bad, either. Anyone who could make her feel the way Ezra did was worth a second chance. She wouldn’t lie to herself. She lusted after him just as much as he did her, but he was a dangerous man, who lived by the nebulous rules of the fringe. Her future had to be secure before she gave herself to him again. Farra shoved the last item into her pack and closed it with a hard swipe.

They left the boarding house and stepped into warm sunshine that threw shadows into the narrow alleys and busy streets as they walked. It was a challenge navigating the unpaved, run-down areas of the city and they had to proceed single file in some places. Ezra led the way, pressing through the crush of people that sometimes filled the street. Farra followed him. Usually she could keep up, but a particularly winding area made her fall several steps behind. 

Contrary to her usual calm in crowds, she began to feel the haphazard walls closing in and a wave of panic overcame her as Ezra disappeared from her view. She called out to him, overcome by a baseless fear of being left behind and losing her way. He hurried back to her and offered his hand without a word. Farra peered at it blankly, uncharacteristic anxiety biting at the edges of her vision. She cast darting glances at the press of the crowd, truly lost for a moment. 

Ezra splayed his fingers and dipped his hand at her impatiently. He had seen this before. Crewmates who had experienced high levels of stress for extended periods sometimes reacted oddly when back in civilization. It concerned him that Farra was experiencing this even before they set back out for the moon. Disquieted, he furrowed his brows. If her nerves were shot, it would be bad for them both. He watched her steel herself before reaching out and she finally put her hand in his. That was good. She came back from her slip quickly, but he would have to watch her from now on. Connected again, they made their way through the bustling streets to their destination. 

* * *

The Ribbon rose above the disorganized gathering of buildings that made up the port. It was barely visible as a thin, infinitely long vertical blot tethered at the bottom and disappearing into the white sky. More visibly, freight containers and transports crawled along at regular intervals on their way to the orbit hubs. Farra and Ezra joined the winding queue for offworld lifts, purchased their passes and boarded their passenger car.

During the ascent, Farra felt more herself. Turning her mind to practicalities, she reflected that organizing a ship lease wasn’t as simple as the process with a freighter pod. Fortunately, Ezra had known of a fleet manager that stocked the kind of vessel they needed and an outfitter for the rest of the gear. Both companies had worked for him in the past, so he knew they were reliable. He certainly had a lot to say about it. Whether to kill time on the trip up the space elevator or because he simply could not keep his mouth shut, Ezra lectured her on the pros and cons of each type of transport. 

“A carpet lander is out of the question. You may or may not be aware that those are notorious for the destruction they cause upon landfall. The last thing we want to do is announce our arrival. And, due to our strategic lack of a crew, we cannot use a Testen or other large ship. I suppose we could consider hiring on, but after the last route and firing by my supposed cohorts, I will decline to pursue that option.” 

He went on about several other types, but ultimately explained that they only had one option that would suit their needs: a two person shuttle with a drop pod attachment. It would be efficient to navigate the shuttle along the old BG Line and the pod wouldn’t be more than a blip dropping planetside.

Once aboard the orbit station, they settled the particulars of craft, cargo and extraction with the leasing agent, who then led them to their shuttle and gave them a walkthrough. It was bare bones, but would be sufficient for their purposes. The exterior was boxy, except for the pod section which was hollowed out of a metal arch in the center, giving it a semblance of mechanical pregnancy. The shuttle pod was smaller than the parcel class they had used, and more streamlined to reduce drag while in transit. Heavy duty connectors on the left and right attached it to the main section of the shuttle, along with the inter-unit airlock. Wear and tear was evident on almost all the exterior panels, but a few well placed kicks and knocks from Ezra confirmed that it was still sturdy and functional. 

Inside, the controls were standard for the interplanetary class, with two seats facing the forward viewscreens. There was an open area behind the seats that led to convertible indentations set several feet back into the center of the ship. The bunks could be interchanged for sleeping or seating, depending on which panel was lifted. After the walkthrough, they took additional time to review the supplies in the hold. Neither of them wanted to be caught short this time. When everything appeared to be in order, Ezra signed off on the last of the contracts and they boarded their small craft. 

Ezra took the pilot seat and strapped himself in. He tossed a binder of laminated pages to Farra, which she caught. 

“Pay attention to the launch sequence. Using the manual is an option, but I want you to get familiar with the instrumentation. We will go over them in more detail once we are on course,” he said. 

Farra secured her own harness and turned to observe him priming the drives and inserting the navigation cartridges. There were several more steps and instruments than the pod, and she noticed that the directional stick was more mobile. 

As Ezra went through pre-flight, Farra compared his actions to the binder. He was right, you could use the instructions in a pinch, but he flew through the process much faster than she could read. 

Finally, he flicked on the radio, toggled the channel to hub operations and requested clearance to take off. The responder called back with the thrust and axis markers he would need to avoid the traffic outside. Red lights cycled in the open area around their ship and an alarm blared audibly through the hull, warning anyone nearby to clear the area. 

With all the protocols met, the bay doors cranked open to reveal the bustling orbitway. Cargo containers were shuffled back and forth between freighters. Space faring vessels of all shapes and sizes entered and left the area, and in the distance, through her half meter diameter viewscreen, Farra could see spider-like scaffolding housing the first build stages of a massive interstellar cruiser. 

Then Ezra punched the thrusters and launched them into the fray, and it was all a whirling blur. She tried to watch what he did, to keep track of his quick movements across the control board, but the dark spots in her vision threatened to blot out the view. 

Her vision cleared after a moment and she hoped he hadn’t noticed. She pretended to examine the pages to the shuttle manual carefully. Her launch sickness had never been a big deal, and she wished to keep it that way. He was saying something about the shipping lanes and navigation, and she shook her head to clear it. 

“Sure got scrappy out here, with all the resource collectors. Central must be gettin’ their credits worth with that freight shippin’ back to them. Mark my words, there will not be a fringe much longer if this press of civilization continues. When I first made my way to the Pug, there were so few ships we did not need to call for clearance to get out of the hub, and there was only the one hub at that time. Now it is so dotted with freighters and builders, one can hardly maneuver properly.” Ezra shifted the shuttle with a downward pull on the stick, narrowly missing a darting transfer skip. He slid a handled lever upward along an incline track and Farra felt herself being pressed back into her seat from the acceleration. 

She was impressed with his smooth guidance of the shuttle. This really wasn’t his first trip. Her skills were rudimentary compared to Ezra’s easy piloting of the craft. He had said he would show her once they were on their way. She only hoped she was a quick learner. 

* * *

They left the system and set out on the now defunct Central-BG freighter line. Ezra’s logic was that the line had just stopped, so it would be less likely to have been picked up by raiders as fair game. Once a course was discontinued, it usually took some time for the less savory elements to take over the territory. The automated equipment status monitoring system, auto-pilot and sensors were set, so the attention needed for navigation was minimal. 

Farra glanced around and loosened her harness. She was tired of studying the flight manual and antsy about their new accord. There was nothing other than his word keeping them in this partnership. She couldn’t forget the disadvantage of her size, but she refused to let fear rule her life. As troubling as the situation was, it was something she could turn into a new skill set if she used her time well. She wanted to get on with the actual training and not be stuck in the pages any more.

She turned to Ezra and asked, “When can I begin flight lessons?” 

He checked a blinking gauge and tapped it, but answered, “We will start shortly and spend a few hours familiarizin’ you. I believe you will be sufficiently prepared with the basics should anything happen while I’m away from the helm. Regardless, I will not be far. We will not need to take standard watches, but there will be times where you will be alone at the helm. Should somethin’ occur, you will be sure to notify me immediately. ” He lifted a couple more switches and started the check process to back up the navigation chart.

“This is much more complicated than others I have seen,” she said, frowning at the rows of buttons and green text on gray screens.

Ezra pushed the straps from his shoulders and got up. He went to stand behind her seat and reached across Farra to pick up the discarded flight manual. 

“You have read this?” He asked.

Farra turned to look up at him, still seated. “Yes, twice since launch. I want to put it to practice.”

“Speaking of launch, do not think I missed your reaction.” He tapped the manual against his palm and eyed her. “That blackout you experience is a weakness you cannot afford, my dear. If you must take off on your own, you will be at a disadvantage. You must overcome it or, if you cannot, you must set yourself failsafes. I will show you the sequences for those, as well.” Ezra pointed at the panel with the book. 

So he did notice. Damn. It had never been an issue before, but she had not needed to solo for any of her previous ventures. He was right. If she did have to make her way off-planet without him, or before the extraction team arrived, she would need to know what to do to set the pod for automatic orientation and pickup.

Ezra set about organizing the review of the instrument panels with Farra. He laid out the manual on a flat area of the console, opened it to the first pages and asked her to point out each item as he read it off. 

Each time she missed a mark, Ezra pointed over her shoulder and made her recite it until she knew exactly what each knob and button was for. He had mnemonics for difference sequences and he had her repeat them as they worked. 

Farra wasn’t happy with the close quarters. His scent surrounded her and the warmth of his body radiated into her space. He seemed to have transitioned to their new arrangement without a second thought and she was caught in a loop of wanting him and resenting him.

Fortunately, he was a driven taskmaster and the time went by quickly, for all that it was uncomfortable for her. Finally, Farra became hungry and asked to stop. They broke for the mid-meal of the cycle and ate while seated at the conn. 

She had the manual open, reading and flipping through the pages as she ate. Ezra saw that she was dedicated, but knew from his own experience that she would wear herself out if she didn’t rest.

He said, “Put that away for awhile. If you keep it up, you will not retain anything. Your dedication is admirable, Farra, but there has to be a time to stop and reflect.” 

When she showed no sign of putting it down, he stood up, tugged the book from her hand and placed it in his pocket. 

“The information will still be there when you’ve finished your food. What has you so determined, little bird?”

Farra knew that she was being obsessive, but learning to pilot was fascinating. There was so much to remember and their lives could depend on her making the right move at the right time. Also, throwing herself into the learning process kept her from thinking about the other things that bothered her.

“I want to do well and another skill will be useful,” she said. “If I don’t work hard at it, I won’t succeed.” She huffed and curled into her seat, taking her food and turning away from him. 

“You will do just fine,” he said, circling around to face her again. His tan jumpsuit bunched as hunkered down in a squat, so that he was eye to eye with her. “You have already come far and done well this cycle. Another few and I will be confident in your abilities to take us where we need to go. Do not doubt it. But you cannot simply work without rest.” He stopped short of patting her leg. She could see that he would have, but he held himself back. He sighed and walked back to the cargo hold. 

Farra went back to her meal expecting to be left in peace, but Ezra returned a short time later with a medium size case. She was immediately interested, but he didn’t approach her. Instead he reached one arm up to the ceiling and leaned forward to stretch. He grinned and gestured at her with the case in his other hand. “This is for you. I was goin’ to wait to give it to you, but this is as good a time as any.”

Farra paused mid-bite. No one had given her anything in years. She wasn’t sure what to say and her face went blank. It was obviously an attempt to get back in her good graces, but a gift? Even knowing the motive, however, she couldn’t bring herself to turn it down. 

“Ok. What is it?” She asked, eyeing the case. Farra was aware of her rudeness, but was too caught off guard to muster much politeness for him.

“Go on and open it,” he said, his smile grew teasing and he raised his eyebrow at her. 

Farra set her food aside, got up and took the case from him. She balanced it on her forearm to pop the clasps. Nestled inside in protective foam, was a Kinski Rotary Thrower. It was nearly the twin of Ezra’s own pistol, but without the arches carved into the barrel. Even unornamented, it was a beautiful piece and, to date, the most extravagant gift she had ever received from anyone. Recognition of the cost made her take a step away from him and attempt to hand him the open case. 

“It’s too much, Ezra. I can’t accept it,” she said, shaking her head. 

Ezra pushed it back to her and said, “You can and you will. Where we are goin’, this is a tool. Pretty, yes, but a tool nonetheless.” 

Farra continued to be obstinate, trying to force him to take it back. 

“I will not have you unarmed on this expedition, or the equivalent with that damned useless Boscelot of yours. Take it. It is a gift and you are showing sincere bad grace, little bird,” he said and rounded on her with uncanny agility. In an instant he was behind her with the case in front of them. He reached over her and drew the weapon out, holding it with two hands in a shooting stance.

The position had him wrapped around Farra, his front to her back. Instead of being startled, she felt so warm and comfortable for an instant that she forgot herself and leaned back into him. And then he placed her hands on the grip of the thrower, taking the case from her in the same movement. 

She held the grip of the Kinski in her right hand, wrapped her left around it and laid her finger straight along the outside of the trigger guard. 

Ezra hadn’t missed her relaxing into him and was pleased that she had, but didn’t move to hold her. Instead, he let his hand fall away from the gun as she took the weapon like she was born to it. When she extended her arms and tilted her head to sight down the barrel, he smiled to himself. She wouldn’t try to give it back to him now. 

The weight of the thrower felt good to Farra. She had only ever owned the light, cheaply built Boscelot. The Kinski was very different. It was properly balanced, for one thing, and solid. Also, the sight was actually straight. A rare smile played across her face as she hefted it’s weight and admired the build. She knew she could put this to good use, if needed. 

* * *

After an extended rest period, they continued with her training and then took some time to outline their incursion into Bakhroma Green. They would set up orbit over the location and drop in a safe distance away from the dig. Then they would use one cycle for recon, or less if they found the area clear. Depending on what they found, they would either attack immediately or fall back and reconfigure the plan. It was an intense way for Farra to spend their first cycle as a team and she was exhausted by the end of it. 

She laid down in her bunk, tucking her pillow under her head. Ezra had insisted that she get some sleep and told her that he would wake her later to give him a break. As she drifted off, she thought about how easily he appeared to be adapting. It was like a switch with him. Flick, and he was all business. Even when she had slipped and leaned into him, he hadn’t taken any advantage. 

She was still edgy and unsure about where they stood, but trusted Ezra more at the moment than she had before. The gift of the Kinski had gone some way toward convincing her of his good will and he was a surprisingly patient teacher. Farra had been observing him and he had either kept his distance, or behaved courteously when he did not. The anger and frustration she had expected out of him had never materialized in either word or deed toward her. He was turning out to be more complex than she had thought. 

* * *

As they traveled and encountered no trouble from the outside, they settled into a routine. The awkwardness of the initial shift faded for Farra as they found their footing again. She put a lot of effort into practicing and Ezra pronounced her piloting skills to be satisfactory. While she would never be an ace, she did feel more confident when she was in charge of the ship. 

Farra watched monitors and reviewed charts as she went through that cycle’s flight checks. She flicked a lever and observed the text that popped up on the screen, comparing it to the last readout. The ship was running nominally and didn’t seem to need much input. It looked as though it would be a boring series of hours, so she took out her journal.

The cabin lighting was dimmed in the bunk area and brighter where she sat. Ezra had been asleep for a while and she could hear his light snore. The man could sleep anywhere. Out like a light as soon as his head hit the pillow. She was envious, since it always took her longer to find her rest. Especially now, after giving up the closeness and the release that she had found with him. Farra could have all that back, she knew, if she only gave in. But, no, she couldn’t. As much as she wanted to curl up with him in the narrow bunk, to tell him to just “take me, damnit!” it would scrape off a piece of her soul and dignity if she did. 

A noise from behind her made her turn around. The thrusters had cycled down and the sudden quiet made the noise more noticeable. He was whimpering in his sleep. The entire time they had been together, she had not seen this from him. He usually dropped off immediately and slept for several hours. 

Farra sat for a few moments, debating what to do. She knew from experience that waking people could be dangerous, but Ezra sounded so pitiful. Finally, she decided that if she were having a bad dream, she would want someone to wake her. She got up and went over to his side. Standing outside his reach, she called his name, low at first, then a little louder. 

Ezra stopped making the high pitched noises that seemed trapped in his throat and opened his eyes. He looked around, blearily. 

“You were having a bad dream,” Farra said and turned to go back to the cockpit. 

Ezra shifted his position on the bunk so that he was up on one elbow to look at her. “Wait,” he said

She stopped and without turning around asked, “What?”

“Thank you,” he said.

She acknowledged his thanks with a short, “Mm hm,” and continued back to her seat.

* * *

Sometime later, Ezra rolled over for what felt like the fiftieth time. No matter how he tried, he couldn’t get back to sleep. The nightmare was an old one. He had a run in with Krebine raiders many stands past and had been subject to the worst treatment of his life while they interrogated him. They never did get the location of his company’s dig out of him, though. His crewmates had staged a successful rescue and he had moved on with his life. Or tried to. Every so often the old fear and pain would take him over in his sleep and he would be stuck in it until he woke. Sometimes he was rescued and sometimes he was...well, sometimes he wasn’t. Either way, it ended. Except this time, Farra had helped him and the change was nice.

He realized that he hadn’t had an episode since that first night with her. The old memories hadn’t been at the front of his mind. The only thing he thought about when he was with her was her, and the aurelac, of course. The prospecting and harvesting had felt like it was his whole life. Here, at the end of the rush, he wasn’t sure what the future held for him now. Farra, he hoped.

Ezra tilted his head back to see if he could spy her from his bunk, curled up in her seat, book on her knee, like always. He smiled to himself. She was lovely, as usual. He could just make out the curve of her cheek and her hair resting alongside it, then she bent her head to check the readouts and disappeared behind the seat back as it swiveled away from him.

So delectable, soft, plush, and warm. He wished with everything he had that he could hold her and have her again, but she wouldn’t want him now. The outcome of their former bargain was too raw, too close. She had since put her foot down and he had agreed to the pact. His darker nature told him there was always the option to step over her boundaries and take what he wanted, but he replied to it that he had never raped a woman and that he never would.

A small piece of what was left of his conscience spoke up to say that Farra hadn’t been willing, that she was coerced. She had no power and he had taken too much. But the part of himself that allowed him to function in the Fringe, that perpetual gray area resident, responded with a stomp that she had made her bargain and had been an active participant. Ezra had enough with the internal argument and silenced the mental dialogue. What mattered now was that the bargain was different and if he wished to be her lover again, he would have to be patient. No more gray.

Patient. He had to be patient and then he could try to win her back. She still desired him, he knew, she craved the things he could do to her, what he could make her feel. His cock began to stiffen as he recalled exactly what she had let him do. What she had done to him. Just how decadently enthusiastic she had been each and every time they coupled. Ezra rolled onto his back. There was one thing he knew that would get him to sleep. 

He slid his hand surreptitiously down his pants, glancing toward Farra. She was still turned away. He cupped his balls and stroked up his penis. A dry tug wasn’t his favorite, but it would do for now. He slowly and lightly stimulated himself, remembering the noises Farra would make when he was making love to her. How her mouth felt when he buried his cock there. She had a little thing she did with her tongue that sent a shiver through his body every time. And when she would look up at him, needy and knowing he would give her what she needed, he would melt. Ezra closed his eyes and stifled a moan. 

He shifted a little to slip off one of his socks to help with the cleanup, keeping it in his opposite hand. He wasn’t trying to advertise his deed and his lack of planning was bothersome. Ideally he would have had something disposable to use, but he had not anticipated needing relief this soon. It must be their confinement, he decided. Constantly in her orbit, hearing her, catching her out of the corner of his eye, observing her when she wasn’t aware of him. He couldn't get enough. 

Ezra longed to be inside Farra to the hilt, her juices flowing around him, soaking his balls. He imagined talking dirty to her and stroked faster. Unlike some others he had been with, she never told him to stop running his mouth. It was so fucking sexy the way she got wetter and bucked harder the filthier his language got. He lifted his hips, pressing his cock in and out of his fist and he felt the tell-tale spasms building. He turned his face sharply into his shoulder and bit a mouthful of his shirt to stem the cry rising in his throat and spent himself into the cloth in his other hand. 

Afterward, his breath came quick and deep and he thought he hadn’t made too much noise. There was an age-old understanding between crew in close quarters. Be as quiet as possible and taking care of necessities would be ignored. If Farra was aware of his actions, Ezra hoped she would understand. He drifted off quickly after that, his sleep deep and dreamless.

* * *

Farra peeked from behind the back of her seat, barely allowing the corner of her eye to show at the edge. She knew she shouldn’t watch, but she couldn’t turn away. The floater taboo against observing others when in an unavoidably shared space was deeply set, but so was her attraction to Ezra. Her breathing set in time with his and sped up when he hit a new rhythm with himself. It had been two cycles since she gave up that connection, but she hadn’t stopped craving him. Now he was taking care of himself and she was across the room, unable to take part. 

In addition to her arousal, she felt relief, as well. That he turned to his own touch to satisfy his needs was reassuring and his overt courtesy wasn’t lost on her. Because of this, she could see that he was determined to keep his word and wait for her to initiate their next sexual encounter. It stung that this was where she had led herself, but if she didn’t stay strong, she feared that he would take back the lead of their relationship. Losing what liberty and self-direction she had would break her. The more distance, the better, she decided and turned her heated face back to her book. 

* * *

  
  


When they were closer to the Green Moon, true boredom started to set in. It seemed the last two cycles would take forever. Clock watching and running the ship took its toll on even seasoned travelers. The constant black of the horizon with only pinpoints of light was almost disorienting. Without the constant output of information from their sensors, it would be easy to believe they were lost or stranded. Unless the thrusters were actively firing, there was no sense of movement, either. 

By that time, they had played all the different card games that they both knew several times over. She had found that Ezra cheated unapologetically, hiding cards with sleight of hand, or outright lying. After the first few games, she stopped being angry about it and became even more determined to win. Out-thinking him had become her own little game and she enjoyed it more than she would ever admit. 

When the entire hold had been inventoried for the third time and Farra ran out of things to read or write, she sat, sighing, lazily spinning her seat. She watched the ceiling circle over her head and poked the floor with her toe to keep going around and around. 

The chair stopped suddenly and Ezra’s grinning face appeared over her. Farra melted back into the seat, letting her arms flop dramatically over the edges and rolled her eyes. She was allowing more and more of her true self to show with him and she hadn’t been disappointed by his reactions. Each time she dropped her guard, she was rewarded with unfeigned interest and interaction from Ezra. He had also been more open and authentic with her, from what she could tell. They had even begun to joke with one another. That he didn’t hold her change of heart against her continued to surprise Farra. That capacity for acceptance seemed to be an integral part of his character that allowed him to adapt to anything life threw his way. 

“What now?” She asked. Her irritation was obviously feigned, but Ezra pretended as if it were real. He drew his face down into an exaggerated frown and spun her playfully as he walked backward away from her.

“If you don’t want to know, then I don’t need to tell you,” he said, and leaned against the bulkhead, arms and legs crossed smugly. 

She stared him down and he couldn't hold back, “But I may have a bit of relief for this monotonous tedium we seem to be experiencing.”

“Not more cards. There is not one more combination I would play with you again, Ezra.” Farra braced herself on the arms of the chair and raised her legs up to cross them, tucking her feet underneath her. It was an unconsciously limber move that made Ezra clear his throat. 

“Not cards. A surprise,” he declared, his eyes twinkling. He couldn’t keep the smile off his face, though Farra saw that he was trying. The small wrinkles next to his eyes told her he was enjoying every moment of building her anticipation.

“Another surprise? I thanked you for my pistol and I still do, but how did you manage all these surprises in the short time before we left?” Farra was skeptical, with good reason. They had barely used one cycle between the decision to return to the Green and their departure from Puggart’s Bench.

Ezra turned away and knelt to rummage through his pack which was secured in the netting under his bunk. “I happen to know people who can procure things, my dear. The amount of time I’ve spent ferryin’ between the Pug and the Green has made me a lot of connections.” He continued to shuffle the items from the bottom to the top of his own personal bag. 

That was the one place that Farra had not dug into in her thorough management of the ship’s stores. If he did have an item she hadn’t seen, that is where it would be. Secretly, she blessed him. The boredom had threatened to overwhelm her. At least on the freighter, she had been able to sneak out to the crane portholes and gangways for a change of scenery. The confinement of traveling light was much more difficult than she had imagined.

“Ah hah!” Ezra exclaimed. “Here it is.” He pulled out a medium sized rectangular box with matte silver buttons along one side. The front had two palm sized squares of fine, black metal mesh on the left and right, and in the middle was a small depression. Ezra pressed a lever on the short side and the top of the long edge popped up into a carry handle. 

“An Elwood Deck!” Farra squealed in delight.

She hadn’t seen a player like that since she had left central. They were few and far between in the frontier. The closest thing she had enjoyed was a headset that she had lost on that first trip to the Green. 

“Any tunes with it?” She asked.

“But of course,” he said. “There would be no point to ownin’ one of these wonderful machines if we did not have the means to use it. Many a night have I spent listenin’ to this contraption and losin’ myself in the music. It should still work a treat.”

He tossed Farra a rolled canvas case which was tied closed. She caught it, untied the knot and unrolled the package. Eight cylindrical music capsules were nestled into individually stitched pockets inside. She recognized one or two popular bands, but some were from artists she didn’t know. A couple were recordable blanks with handwritten labels. 

“Are these all yours?” She asked. 

Ezra stood up and sat the player on the console between their seats. 

“That they are. Let’s have that one,” he pointed to a hand labeled one on the bottom left and Farra handed it to him. 

He plugged it into the player and a bright swinging tune with horns and peppy strings began to play. Stepping back into the open area behind the seats, he started snapping his fingers. Ezra’s enjoyment was as contagious as the music and Farra found herself nodding her head to the beat. She closed her eyes and listened like that for a minute, bopping along. When she opened her eyes again, she was surprised to see Ezra dancing. Actually moving his feet, swaying his hips, and dipping his shoulders. Honest-to-God dancing. The fact that he was good at it was so unexpected that she laughed.

“What is so funny?” He asked and grinned at her, but did not stop. “I’ve scuffed a few boards in my time. Why don’t you get up and join me?”

When he held out his hand, Farra flicked her eyes quickly to the side and bit her lip. She hadn’t danced with anyone in years; not since she was a child. But the music was really wonderful, and her body cried out for movement. After only a second’s hesitation, she took his hand and proceeded to move to the rhythm next to him. 

They danced side by side through a couple songs and Farra let Ezra take her hands and pull her into a few steps with him. She wasn’t as good at keeping time, but she was enjoying herself so much that she didn’t care. He was adept at timing their swings and even twirled her once, successfully, though he did warn her before he did so. She was out of breath and giggling after the third quick tune in a row. The latest song ended and Farra leaned against an interior panel, tilted her head back and closed her eyes, breathing fast. 

Ezra laughed and said, “You are too young to be worn out already, Farra. Get back out here.”

“I’ll sit this one out,” she said, opening her eyes again. “I need a break!”

“Fine, fine,” he said and turned to the player. He pushed two of the buttons on the front and the tune changed to a slow song. 

“A break is fine, but to dance with you would be finer,” Ezra said, turning back and extending his hand to her as if they were at the fanciest dance hall, “Will you dance with me, Farra?”

Farra’s face heated. Her whole body was already warm, but the additional rush of blood was disconcerting. She understood that if she took his hand, she would be letting him in, just a little bit. They wouldn’t just be partners. But damned if she didn’t want to say yes. She took his hand and walked slowly towards Ezra. 

He took her right hand in his left, then drew her left hand up to his shoulder. He placed his right hand on the small of her back, just below her waist. Then he started to move with her. Farra’s leap of faith was rewarded with a lovely turn around the tiny open area in the ship. Ezra deliberately left space between them for decency as he guided her through the steps. It wasn’t complex, just the one-two-three-four combination that Farra had learned as a young girl, but it felt right to be back in his arms again. 

She barely heard the music. Her ears were rushing with blood that seemed to pump too fast and too hard for the slow movements they were making. She was fully aware of just how close she was to Ezra’s unshaven face, his beautiful brown eyes, and his sensitive, talented lips. His warm, strong hand in hers and his palm resting lightly on her back. It was difficult for her to resist moving closer, to simply lean in and tilt her head up to invite him to kiss her, to take her again, to make her feel all the wonderful sensations again. 

This was the most intimate they had been in several cycles and Farra was close to giving in. Then the song ended and another quick tune took its place. 

They stood there for a moment and Farra realized that she was much closer to Ezra than she had meant to be. She contemplated her next move. As much as she longed to rekindle the physical side of their relationship, she couldn’t bring herself to take that last step. 

Farra looked down and let her hair fall into her eyes. She disengaged herself carefully, withdrawing her hand from Ezra’s. She walked slowly to the seats and said, “Thank you, Ezra. That was lovely. I haven’t danced like that in years.”

Without looking back, she sat down and faced the black window that looked out over the nothingness of space. A calm sadness stole over her and she thought about what had brought her to this point. Her decisions and her weaknesses. The wanting that she held inside of her and the unknown future they faced. Yes, she craved Ezra’s touch and attention, but she wanted her freedom more. As charming as he was, he was trouble. A few cycles of friendly games and gifts weren’t going to change that.

* * *

  
  


Ezra was devastated over Farra’s reaction. He had not expected her to fall into such a funk over their dancing. Being close to her again had been wonderful, and they had done nothing that would be inappropriate between acquaintances. He supposed she was still unhappy about their recent history and he accepted that. No one said he would gain her back in such a short time, but he had hoped to make a dent in her armor. Ezra relied so much on his charm, to have it fail so completely was a huge blow to his ego. 

But he swallowed his pride and instead of obeying his body and following her, he went with his natural instinct for people and let her be. She had a lot to work through and he didn’t think his presence would help at that particular moment. Ezra swapped the music cap for a popular band and turned it down enough so that it would only drown out some of the background noise. 

He had begun straightening the sleeping/seating area when he heard Farra speak his name, softly. 

“Ezra?” She said. 

He didn’t turn around, but he answered, “Yes?”

“How we started, what you did,” Farra said, stopping and starting, finding her voice as she went. “It was wrong.”

“Yes,” he said, and hung his head. A thin blanket forgotten in one hand. 

“I don’t want that again. Not with you, not with anyone.” Still seated, Farra turned to face him. 

Softly, he said, “I know that.”

“But this?” She looked around and gestured at the ship, at the player and at Ezra, who was now watching her, “I do want this. But I need to know that this isn’t going to blow up in my face.” A small smile played on her lips and her eyes glittered with unshed tears. “So I thank you, truly, for the dance, but I need more time.”

**Author's Note:**

> [Quick paced song they start with](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dtr6hSVePc4&list=WL&index=34&t=1482s)   
>  [Additional fast paced songs](https://youtu.be/Np50qKCvE_M)   
>  [Slow dance song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dtr6hSVePc4&list=WL&index=34&t=611s)


End file.
